January 23 – 27, 2014

Ukilái: Restore your strength and clarity in a group of other men.

with   Don David Wiley

Embark on a pilgrimage to your soul. Strip away society’s baggage, and learn to balance action, compassion, feelings and achievements in daily life.

Ukilái: (Uh-key-lá-ee) is a word in the Huichol indigenous language that means “a man who has reached a level of maturity and has taken on the responsibilities of spirit, community, and family.” A Ukilái has found his role and place within himself, the community and in the world and therefore is a support for himself and others.

In the indigenous world and the life of our ancestors, the masculine ones were initiated, taught, and guided to interact with each other, the feminine, the community and with the spirits. Knowing who they were, men found a home within themselves and produced balanced relationship with others.

In our culture these roles, references, guides and knowledge have been lost or greatly diminished. The incessant drive and indoctrination of social, economic and materialistic demands of modernity has replaced them. This new paradigm places consumerism, change for change’s sake, and mind over the power of heart at the center of daily life. As a result, we find ourselves alienated from our place and role in the world. As spouses, potential spouses, fathers, sons and brothers we experience breakdown in our relationships with others.

In a culture that constantly imposes these conditions, there comes a time when withdrawing in retreat is necessary to reconnect to the essential being of the masculine, to discover the navigation of one’s heart, to clear, refresh and renew one’s direction in life. Rather than a class or workshop, Ukilái represents a pilgrimage to one’s soul and masculine kinship in order to bring about a restoration. Therefore participation in the Ukilái retreat provides support on an ongoing basis to one’s vision, direction and relationship to others and the world.

At the Retreat I felt an incredibly joyful sense of connection and euphoria, not only with the other men, but also with life and the world. I found this sense of connection similar to the feelings I experienced at the birth of my children and on my wedding day. I experienced the wonderful healing that occurs when we are being truly accepted for who we are. Without a doubt the Men’s Retreat was a life changing experience – a beautiful and mysterious space providing a deep and rich renewal for men from all walks of life. — Phil Roberts


While living in Mexico in the mid-’90s an apparition appeared to Don David Wiley, later to be recognized by indigenous Nahua and Huichol elders, as the Spirit of Fire who asked him

Details & Pricing

Date: January 23-27, 2014, arrive for dinner on the 23rd and depart after lunch on the 27th.
Cost: $975.00

You may register for this program with a deposit. To work out a payment plan other than those offered in the registration process or for registration questions, please contact lindafelch@bluedeer.org.

For transportation information, please click on this link.


The Ukilái Men's Retreat is one of the Lifeways programs offered by the Sacred Fire Community. Lifeways is a series of programs that offer healing from the disconnection from nature, self and community that have crept into human life over recent centuries. For more information about Lifeways, please click here.